After meeting with my cancer team, it was off for more testing before starting chemo. On September 26, 2018, my husband and I went to the MARC Center for my bone scan. We were making so many jokes about my becoming radioactive, figuring out what my super power might be. They called me back and gave me the radioactive tracer. I couldn’t be tested for 1-2 hours; so they told us we could go and get lunch. We had a lunch date…they are far and few in between. After arriving back at the MARC Center, I got the bone scan; which was pretty cool to watch on the screen. Was I done with testing…no.
On October 2, 2018, I had to have another mammogram (they must like putting me through those) so my friend Liz went with me. She has been with me through the biggest tragedies in my life. Obviously, having her there took my mind off all the thoughts that run through my head when I am alone. Now, I am done with testing. You thought I was being serious?
October 5, 2018 was abdominal and pelvic MRI day. The test was quick, and I was glad; I was feeling overwhelmed. So much testing, too many doctors, and so many emotions. Fortunately, a little fun was on the horizon.
Paint the Town Pink
My husband rented a room at the Contessa Hotel on the Riverwalk for me and a few friends. We got together for a “Kick Cancer’s Ass” night out. First we met up at the hotel then walked to a restaurant where we met a few others for dinner and drinks. It was a great time and I was so happy to be able to make some good memories before getting into all of this. I needed the break and I needed my friends and family. After dinner, we walked around to different bars trying different drinks and having a good time. Our trip to Coyote Ugly was fun and having them try to get us to dance on the bar…I didn’t have that much to drink! I was so thankful for those who spent that time with me. Those memories carried me through the beginning days of this process.
Then comes the day for them to put the port in, October 12, 2018, and the day I feared the most up to this point. I do not like procedures and surgeries; they scare me to death. I have extreme anxiety about them. Being put under and not coming out or not being under and being in too much pain. Yes, it may be an irrational fear, but it is my fear nonetheless!
My mother and I are waiting in the lobby, making jokes and trying to make light of the fact that I was about to start the fight of my life. They called us back and I immediately started crying. Crying out of fear of the procedure, fear of the future, sadness that my mom was watching me go through this…there was a lot going on in my mind.
They walked me into the room where the procedure was to take place and they asked me to lie down on the table. I was laying there and tears just started rolling down my face. I asked them if they could give me something, my whole body started shaking and my tears turned into bawling and begging for them to give me something to ease my nerves. One of the nurses walked by, put her hand on my shoulder, patted my shoulder and said, “you will be okay.” But I wasn’t okay, I was very frightened. The next thing I know, I am laying in the recovery room with my mom by my side. Later, I saw a video of me laying in that bed saying, “They tried to kill me, but I made it!” Funny the things you will say under anesthesia.
Next on the schedule…my first round of chemotherapy. FUN!
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